dynagirl

I HATE GAS OVENS. I wouldn’t have electric burners but this crap-ass cheapo stove thingy I bought for a hundred bucks (from the previous tenant) when I was moving into an appliance-free flat sucks so much goddamn cock I can’t stand it. Miss Thang is dearly afraid of unlit pilot-lights, and the motherfucking oven light has gone out TWICE THIS WEEK, leaving her to reach wincingly under into the broiler with a long, lit bamboo skewer, confident THAT HER ENTIRE ARM WILL BURN. And now today, it is out and IT WON’T FUCKING RELIGHT. Hallelujah, my arm isn’t a cinder, but I’M GOING TO DIE OF POISON GAS.

Fuck fuck fuck. I have some errands to run on the west side today and I think I’ll stop at the fancy-ass new GE store, because sticker shock is more fun than DYING LIKE SOME SHIT POET. Bah!